How would you like a job where, every time you make a mistake, a big red light goes on and 18,000 people boo? ~Jacques Plante
We want far better reasons for having children than not knowing how to prevent them. ~Dora Winifred Black Russell
What is told in the ear of a man is often heard 100 miles away. ~Chinese Proverb
I have always thought of Christmas time, when it has come round, as a good time; a kind, forgiving, charitable time; the only time I know of, in the long calendar of the year, when men and women seem by one consent to open their shut-up hearts freely, and to think of people below them as if they really were fellow passengers to the grave, and not another race of creatures bound on other journeys. ~Charles Dickens
A period is just the beginning of a lifelong sentence. ~Cathy Crimmins
Man is harder than iron, stronger than stone and more fragile than a rose. ~Turkish Proverb
Where is Hollywood located? Chiefly between the ears. In that part of the American brain lately vacated by God. ~Erica Jong
"Be yourself" is about the worst advice you can give some people. ~Tom Masson
One more fagot of these adamantine bandages is the new science of Statistics. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
The fly that doesn't want to be swatted is most secure when it lights on the fly-swatter. ~G.C. Lichtenberg
The smell of ink is intoxicating to me - others may have wine, but I have poetry. ~Terri Guillemets
If Columbus had an advisory committee he would probably still be at the dock. ~Arthur Goldberg
Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut save you thirty cents? ~Peg Bracken
I make serious coffee - so strong it wakes up the neighbors. ~Author Unknown
It takes a good deal of physical courage to ride a horse. This, however, I have. I get it at about forty cents a flask, and take it as required. ~Stephen Leacock
My body is here, but my mind has already teed off. ~Author Unknown
God has editing rights over our prayers. He will... edit them, correct them, bring them in line with His will and then hand them back to us to be resubmitted. ~Stephen Crotts
What is so fascinating about sitting around watching a bunch of pituitary cases stuff a ball through a hoop? ~Woody Allen, Annie Hall
Books serve to show a man that those original thoughts of his aren't very new after all. ~Abraham Lincoln
Oh, for the good old days when people would stop Christmas shopping when they ran out of money. ~Author Unknown
My meaningless office job: they pay me for my body and mind, but my heart gets no paycheck and my soul pays the taxes. ~Carrie Latet
Anger is short-lived madness. ~Horace
An atheist is a man who has no invisible means of support. ~John Buchan
Happiness is like a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you. ~Nathaniel Hawthorne
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