I don't need a friend who changes when I change and who nods when I nod; my shadow does that much better. ~Plutarch
An onion can make people cry, but there has never been a vegetable invented to make them laugh. ~Will Rogers
Every time Europe looks across the Atlantic to see the American Eagle, it observes only the rear end of an ostrich. ~H.G. Wells
If my love to you can't be said in a posy, it can't be said in a library. ~Grey Livingston
When I buy cookies I eat just four and throw the rest away. But first I spray them with Raid so I won't dig them out of the garbage later. Be careful, though, because that Raid really doesn't taste that bad. ~Janette Barber
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive. ~Author Unknown
Man does not live by words alone, despite the fact that sometimes he has to eat them. ~Adlai Stevenson
The trouble with having a body is that people know it's where you hang out and you don't get any privacy. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
It's a cruel season that makes you get ready for bed while it's light out. ~Bill Watterson
Whoever called snooker "chess with balls" was rude, but right. ~Clive James
The soul can split the sky in two and let the face of God shine through. ~Edna St Vincent Millay
Complete possession is proved only by giving. All you are unable to give possesses you. ~Andre Gide
No one has ever loved anyone the way everyone wants to be loved. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960
I've been on a constant diet for the last two decades. I've lost a total of 789 pounds. By all accounts, I should be hanging from a charm bracelet. ~Erma Bombeck
Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head. ~Romans 12:20
Gratitude is merely the secret hope of further favors. ~Francois Duc de La Rochefoucauld
In nothing do men more nearly approach the gods than in giving health to men. ~Cicero
No one who achieves success does so without acknowledging the help of others. The wise and confident acknowledge this help with gratitude. ~Author Unknown
Cycle tracks will abound in Utopia. ~H.G. Wells
A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand. ~Author Unknown
A critic once characterized baseball as six minutes of action crammed into two-and-one-half hours. ~Ray Fitzgerald, in Boston Glove, 1970
Keep your flame lit, and you will never feel darkness. ~J. Parker
I, who have no sisters or brothers, look with some degree of innocent envy on those who may be said to be born to friends. ~James Boswell
The rich ruleth over the poor, and the borrower is servant to the lender. ~Proverbs 22:7
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